Motivational Speaking

Rich DiGirolamo is a keynote/motivational/professional development speaker who writes a biweekly e-mail message known as "Are You Done Whining." A recent issue caught our attention, and we reprint it here. Hopefully Rich won't take offense, and as a plug for him, his website is http://www.richdigirolamo.com/

Hey Kids!

In the past I have mentioned that I live on a small lake in central Connecticut. It is actually two lakes; a causeway separates the two. And that seems to be the problem.

The causeway has created a mentality ­ the North Lake versus the South Lake. The board is North Lake heavy. I live on the South Lake. My South Lake neighbors seem to feel that all the decisions are being made to benefit the North Lake.

Friday night I treated three of my neighbors and their wives to dinner; it was the least I could do after they helped repair my dock which had twisted, bent, and fallen into the lake as a result of ice heaves this winter. Little did I know that dinner was going to be four hours of drinking and whining!

Four hours later I had heard how lake monies are being spent to help fix one person's property. I heard about how one person is encroaching on state land. I listened to accusations about how certain board members are trying to change the number of watercraft allowed per lakefront property. I heard how the board is in bed with the highway superintendent ­ (one of the wives mentioned she wouldn't mind being in bed with him). I listened to complaints about people who have not obtained their vessel stickers yet (I am one of those people). I listened to grumblings about the lake safety committee not being respected. I listened to how the water quality on the North Lake is so much better than the water quality of the South Lake. Yes, I listened. One of the wives even commented how I tend to listen and not talk. I do tend to listen; especially when liquor has been tossed into the equation.

So the consensus at the table was that "we" - the South Lake - need to take control of the board. "We" need to get our opinions heard. I was told they need me to join their cause.

Okay, here I thought I was going to dinner and now I'm being recruited for the army. I could see six fingers pointing at me. Above the heads I could see the words...The South Lake Wants You!

It's too bad they want me to volunteer and get involved for all the wrong reasons.

Why do people volunteer? Why do you volunteer?

For the fun of it?
To get involved?
To make a difference?
To make an organization bigger and/or better?
For self-serving reasons?

If you've ever sat on a committee or a board you probably know and are familiar with one thing...most people are there for self-serving reasons. Yes, they are looking for fun, to get involved, make something better, and to make a difference. But if you don't think that the majority of people have their own agenda, this is your wake up call. People are looking to network; they're looking to make contacts, they're looking find jobs, get a promotion, be more visible to upper management, or perhaps they are trying to use their role on that committee or board to better or improve their own life circumstances. It's that simple. I am not at all saying this is a bad thing, I am saying what is fact. But I truly believe that you can accomplish all five of the points above if your heart and your head are in the right place.

I understand the frustrations of my neighbors. I even love their passion about something that is so important to them. But is the answer to take control of a board in order to get YOUR agenda through; to stick it up the you know what of the people you're about to oust? That is not why you serve. You're serving a community; not a select few. If you truly want to leave your mark make decisions that benefit everyone; north and south. The mentality of "it is now the south's turn" will just further divide the community.

This is the time of year when a lot of organizations are installing new board members. I have had the opportunity to facilitate several board retreats during this period and here is what I observe a good board or committee member knows that he or she is there to serve their community; whatever that community is. A good member puts service first. A good member votes on and passes an agenda that seems to make the most sense for all, not a select few, and especially not with his or her own interests at the forefront. A good board member knows the difference between service and self-serving.

So I'm thinking long and hard as to whether or not to attend the next meeting. I'm thinking about going to listen to the arguments of the other side. I'm thinking as to how and if I should get involved. But I do believe I have an immediate simple solution to this whole North-South mess...Blow up the causeway!

See you in two weeks.


(WayneWho again... If you'd like to sign up for Rich's mailing list, or perhaps book him for a future event, visit his website at http://www.richdigirolamo.com/ )