Osceola County Targeted By Virus

For many around the world this April Fools Day will be no joke at all. Millions of computers will be infected with a computer virus knows as 'Conflicker' that is set to launch some unknown style of attack today. For many computer users, today will be a day filled with anti-virus updates, screaming at Microsoft technical support, and in the most extreme cases, trips to the dumpster with the infected PC's. Not a fun day at all.

The WayneWho staff has uncovered information on an even more insidious Conflicker Worm Variant that set to launch its attacks and focus them on Osceola County Florida. This variant that has been dubbed 'Cowlick.B' and already has the hair on some technology professionals' heads, standing on end. "This is the worst threat that we have seen because it affects more than just your computer and we have no way to tame a Cowlick," noted one security professional buying Norton Anti-Virus and a comb at the local Staples.

One City of Kissimmee Commissioner, Cheryl Grieb, who had been predicting this disaster for the past several years and was thwarted in her efforts to remove 'Cowlick.B' point of origin, was upset by the news. "I knew this would happen. You put a cow on a logo and someone is going to go after you for it. It is too late now. We are all just going to have to come together so we can get through this hair crisis," stated Commissioner Grieb.

For those who are infected with the 'Cowlick.B' virus we caution against radical steps to get rid of the problem. While there is no 'Cowlick.B' removal tool on the Internet at this time, industry professionals strongly urge against using scissors to deal with the threat. The first step you should take is to consult with your stylist. Be aware that some local stylist may already be compromised and prone to 'Cowlick.B' distribution. The WayneWho staff recommends a Crisco topical hair solution to tame the unruly effects of the the 'Cowlick.B'. This old school solution seems to be the only effective method in combating this new age threat.

Be safe and April Fool's.